A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral.
A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.
Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The
heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.
At that point, one of the mourners burst out laughing. When all eyes stared at him, he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral... I'm
a gynaecologist."
At that point, the proctologist fainted.
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it's worth the read
http://mdn.mainichi.co.jp/waiwai/0306/0623frogs.html
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A Family of Collingwood supporters head out one
Saturday morning to do their Christmas shoplifting .
While in Rebel Sports the son picks up a Carlton
footy jumper and says to his 10 year old sister,
"I've decided to become a Carltonsupporter and I
would like this for Christmas".
His sister, outraged by this, promptly whacks him
round the head with her carton of Winfields and
says, "Go talk to Mum."
Off goes the little lad with the Carltonfooty
jumper in hand and finds his mother. "Mum?"
"Yes son?"
"I've decided I'm going to be a Carltonsupporter
and I would like this jumper for Christmas". The
mother is outraged at this and throws her moccasins
and a full stubbie of VB at him, promptly whacks him
around the head and says, "Lets go talk to your
father".
Off they go to Pentridge during visiting hours with
footy jumper in hand and find Bubba, his father.
"Dad?"
"Yes son?"
"I've decided I'm going to be a Carltonsupporter
and I would like this jumper for Christmas". The
father is outraged and promptly whacks his son
around the head with his fists and says, "No son of
mine is ever going to be seen in THAT", and then
kicks him from one end of the rec. room to the other
for further good measure.
About half an hour later they're all back in the car
and heading towards home (Reservoir). *The mother
turns to her son and says "Son, I hope you've
learned something today?"
The son says, "Yes knackers I have."
"Good son, what is it?"
The son replies, "I've only been a Carltonsupporter
for an hour and already I hate you Collingwood
Pricks."